Grandma School: Accepting Change and Creating Space

Our family room is our playroom. This is easier for my lifestyle and the kids feel secure that I am always near.

For grandparents that are providing full time care while your kids work, it takes a shift in your mindset to make it work for everyone.
This advice is for people who take care of children during the day full time. It is not for every grandparent. Those, like me, who have taken on this lifestyle might benefit from my guidance. It comes from 8+ years of full daytime child care.

A Lifestyle Shift

When I started Grandma School eight years ago, it quickly became more than an activity—it became a lifestyle. I had to rethink everything: how I decorated, how I got chores done, and how our home functioned day to day. Baby-proofing, toy storage, and a house sprinkled with handprints on windows and jelly smudges became the new normal. Accepting that shift made the transition much easier.

Creating a Play-Friendly Home
My family room is now devoted to play. The coffee table is long gone, replaced by a sturdy play table (definitely a must-have). Bins of toys sit ready for curious hands, and a giant dollhouse anchors the space. At the moment, life is especially full with a three-year-old and a one-year-old under my care. That means extra clutter—like a crib right in the living room. It may not be picture-perfect, but this setup works best for us. I do have room for a separate play area, but I’ve found that keeping everything close at hand makes life run more smoothly.

Accepting the Mess
Bottom line: accept the change, accept the mess, and accept the space toys take. When you do, your grandchildren feel more accepted and truly wanted in your home. They see it not as a place they’re just visiting, but as their “home away from home.”

Setting Boundaries with Love

Yes, you can (and should) set boundaries and make them clear. But creating a space that welcomes kids—mess and all—helps them feel secure. They don’t have to tiptoe around, worried about breaking or ruining something. Instead, they can relax and be themselves.

The Payoff

I’ve found that embracing this mindset and modeling it for my grandchildren has deepened our relationship. They know they belong here. And while this shift can be a hard pill to swallow for some grandparents—it does require a changed mindset up front—the reward is worth it. In the end, your home becomes a safe, homey place where your grands feel truly at ease.

I keep a basket at front door of shoes, coats, tutus, and anything else a kid would need to go outside. I also leave the stroller up all week because it is hard for me to undo it every time. If stuff gets used, it isn’t clutter. It is gear. If things pile up that don’t get used, deal with them quickly. #accepttheclutter #embracethemess.